Short Shorts

I would like to write an expose about how I have to spend an absolutely unreasonable amount of time, time that could be spent doing a lot of other things, literally “covering my ass” as a woman in the modern world. It’s close to delusional, actually. I am talking in literal terms, not in figurative ones.

I went for a bike-ride this morning. I go for bike rides for a few reasons, some are for exercise and some of it is to get out of the house and out of my head. It’s going to be 90 degrees here in Portland today, and I can already smell the stink of the concrete before 11 in the morning. The days are long, the nights are short, and it’s a drastic change from the impossibly dark, rainy winters we experience. While bike riding, I day dreamed of the May blossoms and tried to motivate myself to pedal faster. The flowers distract me from the weirdos I encounter on my bike rides and the intrusive thoughts of climate apocalypse that are slowly invading my brain. Just pedal faster, just pedal faster, maybe if I keep pedaling I can make the wildflowers come back. While pedaling, I was wearing a pair of short shorts.

I re-entered the street I live on - 11th, which is a pretty safe street in general - and as I got back onto my street, this weird guy passed me with an open window, looked at me and said “nice day for a bike ride, huh?” - and the first thing I did, with all of the might left in my little lungs after biking for 45 minutes - I screamed “weirdo!!!!!”. 

A few months ago I started wearing a boyfriend’s jockey underpants underneath my work-out shorts, after realizing that they were in fact, more comfortable than other shorts and they seemed to confuse the demographic of creeps that tend to give me an abnormally excessive amount of attention. The jockey boxers are comfortable and also a nod to the fact that my dad was a former jockey. They also cover my butt and under-butt, and as a woman who loves to do yoga, dance, and to bike these shorts seemed like a god send. When we broke up, my boyfriend wanted these underpants back and I wouldn’t let him have them. It was almost comical, maybe even heart-breaking to some extent. “Sure, take your Japanese denim for all I care! But whatever you do, don’t take the fabric away from me that is keeping me safe”. My reasoning was that, if this man was no longer sleeping in the same bed as me, protecting me from bodily harm in the middle of the night - I would at least need a layer of protection from the creeps that would inevitably lear at me with unasked for comments. 

People wonder why “women are the new men” - and I really think it comes down to the fact that we constantly have to protect ourselves. Men don’t need protection from each-other, women need to carry pepper spray and knives, stay in marriages and relationships that make them unhappy to feel physically safe, and be “on the look-out” doing something as simple as buying groceries by themselves. I have often felt gas-lighted by modern culture, because it refuses to acknowledge the effort that I put into keeping myself safe, and if I fuck that up at all, our culture punishes me. Our culture says “Well, you need to cover up, those shorts are an invitation for men to look at you”; “You’re wearing that for attention, it’s your fault”; “Your shorts were too short, and this is why you’re attracting attention”. We’ve created a culture of fear. 

We live in a culture that shames women for being beautiful, one of guilt and shame. I would rather live in a culture where I can exercise and breathe and wear short shorts and not have some weirdo make unwanted moves on me.  

Women have to be on guard, women are warriors. 

Blog Post Title Two

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

Blog Post Title Three

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.

Blog Post Title Four

It all begins with an idea. Maybe you want to launch a business. Maybe you want to turn a hobby into something more. Or maybe you have a creative project to share with the world. Whatever it is, the way you tell your story online can make all the difference.

Don’t worry about sounding professional. Sound like you. There are over 1.5 billion websites out there, but your story is what’s going to separate this one from the rest. If you read the words back and don’t hear your own voice in your head, that’s a good sign you still have more work to do.

Be clear, be confident and don’t overthink it. The beauty of your story is that it’s going to continue to evolve and your site can evolve with it. Your goal should be to make it feel right for right now. Later will take care of itself. It always does.